Sunday, June 21, 2009

How to Be a Good Wife...

I've been scurrying around all week to get everything organized before my mom comes today (which also happens to be Father's Day and Brian's birthday). I really want to make today extra special for Brian...

I recently read an old article from a May 13, 1955 Housekeeping Monthly magazine. In it, I found tons of useful tips and information on how to perfect the art of being a good homemaker/wife...

Brian is going to be thrilled!

1. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed. (check!)

2. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people. (check!)

3. Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it. (check!)

4. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. (check!)

5. Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper etc. and then run a dust cloth over the tables. (check!)

6. Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift, too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction. (check!)

7. Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimise all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet. (check!)

8. Be happy to see him. (check!)

9. Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him. (check!)

10. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first--remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours. (check!)

11. Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax. (check!)

12. Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit. (check!)

13. Don't greet him with complaints and problems (check!)

14. Don't complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day. (check!)

15. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. (check!)

16. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice. (check)

17. Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him. (check!)

18. A good wife always knows her place. (check!)

Now the check list is complete! Can't wait for him to see the new me!! (tee hee)

Happy Father's Day, Brian!


  1. Oh my gosh! I laughed through this whole list. Women of the 50's were so repressed! While I agree with some of these things, If my husband was out all night, that would scream cheater! Also, whatever he has to say is more important than what I have to say? Yikes!

  2. This list is HILARIOUS - oh, and PLEASE do NOT show it to my Brian. He is SO missing out on a good housewife. I just can't!

  3. I am laughing sooooo hard! Ed is very jealous and wants you to have a seminar for all the other wives in the ward;)

  4. My husband might think I was possessed--this is so not practical for a mother at home with little kids. What were they thinking?

  5. Oh goodness!!!! My husband would think I have really lost it if I acted like that and did all of those things!!

  6. Well,hello June Clever....

    Holy Moly, I got exhausted and overwhelmed after the first three!!

    I'll definitely be anxious to see the reformed you. Too funny.

  7. Shannon, this is CRAZY! I mean really?!
    I am so glad that this all was done as a present because, I agree with Susan when she mentioned being overwhelmed after the first three. Although, I absolutely love the thought of these loving gestures, it sure does make me appreciate the struggle that women have gone through to not make it so chauvinistic.
    I mean for real..." remember his topic's are more important than yours???" Yep got that one covered. ???

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  9. yes but did you remember to wear your high heels at the stove? :)

  10. i've read this article before but laughed just as hard reading it again here on your blog. rich is sitting in the office with me tonight (his and hers computer are the key to our successful marriage!). anyway, i read several outloud, and my favorite response of his was for number two - he said, "when WAS the last time you wore a ribbon in your hair?" hillarious. i swear i would've been a bra burner if i had been born back in those days. :) thanks for sharing, what a great post!

  11. I've read this article before and it makes me so mad! What in the world? It's upsetting to even think of it being real and then to think of all the women who read that and did it. Wow.

  12. Oh. my. Hilarious! And unbelievable. Especially the part about the evening belonging to him. Because I'm sure the mother hasn't done anything that might necessitate a little rest and relaxation...